What could we do with more time? So many books i’ve been meaning to read, so many movies, comics, and anime. So many things to write and learn. Yet i feel i often sleep my time away. Hours spent trying to hold onto dreams that continue  to slip away like sand in an hour glass. Why do i chase such dreams? Perhaps just another sign that depression still lingers in me.

What of the past? A popular fantasy is to redo the perceived mistakes you made with your knowledge now. If the past where changeable, would anyone ever grow up? We always carry our mistakes, and for the many with such mental health issues, even the smallest of strife may linger for a long time. I still recall a moment of my childhood, one of my earliest of memory’s, yet still clear as glass. I worked up the courage to ask two other boys in a park to play with them. They said no, for some reason that simplest of childhood pain holds stronger then any birthday. They say that children often forget the good, and remember the bad. It is no wonder then that so many wish they could master time and change such memory’s.

One thought on “Time

  1. I REALLY struggle with regret. It is my nemesis. Depression and hypomania and anxiety chooses for me often and I look back and say WTF? What did I do? My mistakes are at times colossal and legion. The worst right now for me is what my life would be like it I hadn’t married. Ouch, a hard regret to get over.

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