When we where kids there was always the question of what we wanted to be one when we grow up. I want to be a teacher, i want to be a writer, but to be honest, i’ve never really thought too much on it. When i was younger, i never thought i live this long. As bleak as that is, its the truth. I’ve never decided what i wanted to be, i couldn’t think of the future, not when i was in so much pain at the time.

Here i am, 25, no girl, a job i kinda just fell into, and not even a drivers licence. I just go with the flow of life, it was a coping mechanism. My actions in the past have effected my now. How am i supposed to meet a girl with no experience and terrible anxiety? My life is rather directionless, however its an improvement over not wanting to live. I need to move forward, no matter how scary that is. So am taking my one step at a time motto and working on getting a learners permit, its a step at least. Perhaps its something to make my world just a little less cramped. I really am scared, but i have to try.

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